Tag Archives: Place Attachment

The Project: How It Started, How It’s Going

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My last post was the first part of a personal application to the concept of place attachment.

It’s all about loving where you live…

…starting with your home.

That post provided the context and brief story of why Anita and I made the decision 3+ years ago to stay put in our home of 28+ years, embarking on a renovation process which was recently completed.

In the spirit of the How It Started and How It’s Going craze of the past few years, I present to you a pictorial rendition of “The Project” with minimal comments. Be sure to look at the acknowledgments at the end for the great people who envisioned and pulled it off!

MASTER BATH

Almost ashamedly, the master bath had stayed the same since a few years after we moved in – in 1995!

Is there a better definition of How It Started and How It’s Going or what?

In addition to providing a walk-in shower with bench, there is much more storage space, brighter lighting, a heated floor, and a tankless water heater for the whole house.

DISNEY ROOM

Our three original kids’ bedrooms became multifunctional, while still keeping the ability to provide beds. Here’s our daughter Amy’s bedroom – pretty much the same through high school, college, and graduate school.

Now, it’s the “Disney Room” for our grandchildren’s enjoyment, completed with a LEGO Disney castle, two bookshelves, a reading nook, an enchanted rose, and even a “magic mirror.”

MY OFFICE

The upstairs bedroom suite, originally home to two of our boys, began to transition into my office in 2007. Needless to say, over the next few years, things got a little out of hand. Anita says the only way to truly appreciate the chaos of my office back then is via a panoramic image.

Yeah… As the picture indicates, I’m a horizontal organizer. Anyway, after over ten years of growing more chaotic, I saw the light, and agreed with Anita’s idea of the perfect office for me.

Not pictured is a futon that can sleep two. Also not pictured – the several thousand books relocated to my “library annex” for eventual disposition.

FAMILY ROOM

Not a lot to say here; while the kids were home, most evenings everyone who was home ended up here watching TV, reading, or something similar. We’ve hosted birthday parties, small groups, family gatherings of all types, and many other events here.

All of that still happens, but as you get a hint of above, and will see more clearly below, the location of many of those events has shifted. The biggest change here was the design and installation of the feature wall around and above the fireplace.

KITCHEN

Our kitchen has always played an important role beyond the preparation of food. From various tables at the rear window to hanging around the island, our family has spent many hours prepping meals, talking, laughing, occasionally crying, but always enjoying our connections.

Again, this is a great demonstration of How It Started and How It’s Going…

As you can tell, this is the heart of our renovation project. For over a year, Anita and I couldn’t figure out how to lay out what we were thinking of. We were comfortable designing the fireplace feature, and Anita did an amazing job on the design of the Master Bath and my office, but when it came to the kitchen, we were stumped. Through the connection of a neighbor, we met Tiffany Bray, an interior designer, and after initially spending a few hours with her, the result was the design you see above. With input from our two chef sons, she truly captured – and our contractor Todd Haudek delivered – what we were trying to come up with: a family gathering space, centered around food preparation, but with lots of space to involve as many people as possible. The island is massive – at least in our experience – but also seems quite comfy when family or friends are gathered around it to help with final food prep or circling around the buffet line. Built around a 36″ dual fuel range that Anita and I are still getting used to, the island is truly the center of the gathering space. Storage is located mostly along one wall, extending all the way to the top of 9′ ceilings and anchored on one end by an enlarged walk-in pantry and the other by a unique feature Anita came up with: a floor to ceiling storage cabinet that opens up to the hall, but is easily accessible to the kitchen. The rear wall has a long counter with seating, with a sliding window opening to the deck with a counter on the exterior. The coffee station – a must for all of our kids – has proven to be a natural go-to spot in the mornings. And finally – and most notably – removing the wall between the kitchen and dining room really opened up the space. It’s not so much a kitchen and open dining room as it is a true gathering space.

DINING ROOM

The space you see below has had multiple functions over the years – built and used as a dining room, it has also been a music room, an office for me, and work space for numerous school projects over the years.

That changed! In addition to removing the wall as noted above, we pushed the rear wall back 5 feet, aligning it with the rest of the house. It was only a few dozen square feet of new space, but combined with the wall removal, created a whole different feel. Additionally, we replaced the window with an 8′ door with sidelights – not only providing plenty of natural light but drawing the eye upward.

DECK

As you see below, the original rear of the house had a small concrete patio extending under the overhang. There was an exterior paver patio at the other end of the house, but it wasn’t used much.

We wanted to create an outdoor space with lots of gathering options, and once again, Tiffany came up with a great design.

The result? A deck extending 12 feet out, the length of our house. On the dining room end, it extends 15 feet, with a covered porch above it. For safety, railings extend all around, with an opening onto steps leading to the backyard. In the middle of this very hot summer, the shade of the trees, the porch, and a fan make it bearable. In the evenings, it’s downright delightful! Even with the great gathering space inside, in just a few weeks, we’ve found that our guests naturally migrate to the deck, enjoying the outside views of our own 100 Acre Wood.

PROJECT ACKNOWLDEGEMENTS

Fireplace Wall Feature and Master Bath 

  • Contractor – Joel Presson, J-KAP Construction
  • Electric – Jeff DeMeo, JD Electric
  • Plumbing – Jeff Tadlock, Harold Ellis Plumbing

Kitchen, Dining Room, Deck 

  • Design – Tiffany Bray, TBD Tiffany Bray Designs
  • Contractor – Todd Haudek, Haudek Homes
  • Electric – Jeff DeMeo, JD Electric
  • Plumbing – Jeff Tadlock , Harold Ellis Plumbing

The individuals noted above provided excellent craftsmanship for our projects over the last few years. I wholeheartedly recommend each of them in their respective area of expertise, and would be happy to talk with anyone who wants to know more about what they do and how to contact them.

In closing, Anita and I want to again provide all the thanks to God for providing for our work, and reiterate that these spaces are not for just our enjoyment, but to extend the extraordinary hospitality God has shown us to family, neighbors, friends, and “friends we haven’t met yet”!

July 28, 2023

How to Measure the Power of Place Attachment

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To be rooted is perhaps the most important and least recognized need of the human soul

Simone Weil

What if a place becomes the right place only by our choosing to love it?

Melody Warnick, author of the fabulous book This Is Where You Belong, sets the whole tone of her book in the first chapter talking about “Place Attachment.”

Humans are instinctively driven to form connection with places. 

The most common term for this is “place attachment,” because it suggests the affectionate, almost familial connection that can form between us and where we live. You mostly know it when you feel it, which you probably have. When you roll into your town after being away for awhile and say, “It’s good to be home,” that’s a product of place attachment. So is feeling drawn as if by magic to a particular city, never wanting to leave the place where you grew up, or never wanting to leave the place you live right now.

If all this sounds a bit touch-feely, it is. Like happiness, place attachment exists partly as emotion and partly as a pattern of thought, which makes it difficult to quantify.

Over the years researchers have developed a “place attachment scale” of statements they use to gauge the sensation. Study participants are usually asked to rank their agreement on a scale of 1 to 5, but for the sake of simplicity, you can assess your own place attachment by answering each of the questions below “true” or “false” about the town or city where you live. Click here or on the image below for a PDF.

The more times you answer “true,” the more likely you are to be attached to your town. Making nineteen or more “true” answers, which puts you in the top quartile, indicates that you probably feel strongly connected to where you live. Six or fewer, on the other hand, suggests that you live somewhere unfamiliar or in a town you’re not particularly over the moon about. And if you’re not very place attached you may be saying to yourself, “Clearly place attachment feels nice. But why should I care? Will it actually make my life feel better?”

According to place attachment research, the answer is a resounding yes. Studies show that when you pit “Stayers” – long-term residents of a place – against “Movers,” the Stayers are generally far more social.

Where we live matters, and staying where we live matters. When it comes to place attachment, our towns are what we think they are.

No matter what anyone else thinks, your town just has to make you happy.

And being a good neighbor starts with you.

I can’t emphasize this enough: If you like the idea of loving where you live, of being a better neighbor, or anything remotely connected, you MUST check out the work of Melody Warnick. Follow her on social media. Buy the book (below). Sign up for her newsletter on her website. Peruse the website for other articles she has written. It’s all PURE GOLD.

Inspired and adapted from

This is Where You Belong, Melody Warnick