We know it when when we feel it, and we know it when we see it, but presence is hard to define. On the other hand, most of us are quite good at describing the lack of it.
Amy Cuddy
Presence arises from a sense of personal empowerment, enabling us to be deeply connected with our authentic selves. In this psychological state, we can maintain a strong presence even in the midst of highly stressful situations that typically lead to distraction and a feeling of powerlessness. When we experience presence, our speech, facial expressions, postures, and movements seamlessly align, creating a synchronized and focused demeanor. This internal harmony is not only tangible but also resonant because it reflects our genuine selves. The pursuit of presence is not about cultivating charisma, extraversion, or meticulously managing the impressions we make on others. Instead, it revolves around fostering an authentic, powerful connection within ourselves.
This type of presence is achievable through gradual changes. There’s no need for extensive pilgrimages, profound spiritual revelations, or complete inner transformations – while these are valid pursuits, they can seem overwhelming, abstract, and idealistic to many. Instead, let’s concentrate on moments – a state of psychological presence that endures just long enough to guide us through challenging situations where the stakes are high, such as job interviews, tough conversations, idea pitches, seeking assistance, public speaking, and similar scenarios.
True presence is about the ordinary and the everyday; it’s accessible to everyone. The key is learning how to summon that presence, especially during life’s critical moments when it tends to elude us.
In the context of modern elders seeking to be truly present to others, the concept of presence aligns with the idea of being fully engaged, attentive, and authentic in interpersonal interactions. Here are some key aspects to consider:
Mindfulness and Awareness: Modern elders aiming to be present prioritize mindfulness and self-awareness. This involves consciously focusing on the current moment, setting aside distractions, and being fully attuned to the person or situation at hand. By cultivating mindfulness, modern elders can create meaningful connections and contribute more effectively to the well-being of others.
Active Listening: Being present also involves active listening. Modern elders strive to genuinely understand others by listening with empathy, suspending judgment, and responding thoughtfully. This not only fosters better communication but also demonstrates respect for the perspectives of those around them.
Authenticity and Vulnerability: Modern elders seek to be authentically themselves in the presence of others. This involves embracing vulnerability, sharing personal experiences, and being open about one’s own journey. Authenticity enhances trust and creates a supportive environment for learning and growth.
Cultivating Emotional Intelligence: Presence extends to emotional intelligence, where modern elders are attuned to their own emotions and those of others. By navigating emotions effectively, they can foster positive relationships and provide meaningful support to younger generations.
Balancing Technology and Human Connection: Modern elders are mindful of the role of technology in their lives and its potential to create mental clutter. They actively manage their digital presence, ensuring that technology enhances rather than hinders their ability to connect with others on a deeper level.
Time Management: Being present also involves effective time management. Modern elders prioritize their commitments, creating space for quality interactions with others. This may involve setting boundaries, delegating tasks, and focusing on activities that align with their values and goals.
Continuous Learning and Adaptability: The concept of being present extends to a mindset of continuous learning. Modern elders remain curious, embracing new ideas and perspectives. This adaptability allows them to connect with younger generations and stay relevant in a rapidly evolving world.
By embodying these principles of presence, modern elders can fulfill their role as mentors and guides, providing valuable support and wisdom to younger individuals while creating a positive and enriching environment for mutual growth and learning.
And of course I’ve got a bookshelf of resources related to Presence that I’m working through. They will be appearing in future Wednesday Weekly Reader posts.


